Friday, October 8, 2010

Blog Strike

Don't take this personally, guys, but I'm going to quit reading your blogs if you have a baby! Why, you ask? For your own safety! Because if I have to read one more post about how your baby 'falls asleep completely on their own without a peep' I WILL hunt you down & kill you. Got it? I'm happy for you..& I like you..but reading that makes me hate you.

Now.

This is the part where you all jump in with your sleep strategies & 'training'. I WANT to hear your advice. UNLESS. UNLESS. It involves crying it out!! Because I won't do that. Call me crazy/silly/softy etc. You may be right. But I won't. We tried that for a while..and this is how it went:

Aiden screaming. Aiden Screaming. Aiden SCREAMING. Meghan bawling. Hysterically. Go in to check on him & 'reassure' him. Aiden SCREAMS & grabs frantically at any part of my body he can get his tiny hands on. Go out. Cry in hall. AIDEN SCREAMING. Go in to check....PUKE everywhere!!! More times than once. The only variation was when it was BLOOD everywhere, 'cause he bit his tongue. He doesn't wear out. He doesn't calm down. He does. NOT. sleep. And while it may work for some people..to me it feels torturous (to me & him) & I feel like I'm breaking my child. Because after all the crying..it takes HOURS to calm him down to a whimper. And then he won't eat.

So. I love you guys. And I would like to hear your sleep advice. But I'm warning you..if you mention crying it out..I WILL be annoyed :)

Peace!

*UPDATE*: I just want to make abundantly clear that I don't think you're a terrible parent if you do/have use(d) the CIO method of sleep training. I'm not judging anyone here..there is no one size fits all & you do what works for you & your kiddo..that's what's important.

28 comments:

That one girl said...

Oh man, that would of TOTALLY freaked me out. BLOOD?! Poor thing! Crying it out worked for us but too bad their isn't one answer for everyone. Also, Sawyer is too lazy to fight sleep. Though that laziness gets him to sleep, kid won't use his words to save his life! So though you have issues sleeping maybe that fighter will USE HIS WORDS when he is old enough! :)

Hope something works out girl!

Shantaye said...

Meg I know you're going crazy with the lack of sleep and I wish there was something I could tell you that would help. Maybe if you really feed him a ton at night he'll make it through the night better. Try adding some oatmeal or rice cereal to his bottle to fill his tummy a little more. For naps try getting a really cool mobile that lights up and plays different music and maybe he'll be content to just lay in his crib and be entertained by the new toy. That way he could at least start liking his crib instead of hating it... good luck babe!

MEGandJEFF said...

Holly: Yeah..I flipped when I walked in to blood all over! And thank you for reminding me that there's always (almost) a positive for every challenge..Aiden is a very vocal kid..let's hope he doesn't get too mouthy! :)

Shan: Thanks for the advice & support:) I wish I could add oatmeal or rice to a bottle..but the kid won't take a bottle if my boobs are anywhere in the vicinity! :) Jeff & I have been thinking of a mobile for a while..we should just get one! Duh! haha

Dan+Alli said...

Why do I feel like this post is directed toward me? HAHA I love you. And the sucky thing is that what worked for everyone else will most likely not work for you. But a friend gave me her advice and it worked so...I will give you the advice she gave me and I will pray it works for you. I do know kind of how you feel. Cody would SCREAM we tried everything and nothing seemed to work. So hard. I'll send you an email because this is already getting lengthy.

Becca said...

Healthy sleep habits, happy child is the book to read I've been told.

Amber said...

No comment.

Ok, I will comment, but don't be mad :) I read a book called "The Sleep Easy Solution" with Mitchell. I really didn't have to deal with it with Kayla, she was just a good sleeper. Mitchell...definitely not. And a fighter at that. Book helped a lot though. It is a CRY it out book, but not like what you are thinking. Makes it much more comfortable for everyone. Sorry.

Ashley said...

read: "Babywise," "Healthy sleep habits, Happy Baby," and "Happiest baby on the block." They have a lot of great strategies.

A lot of people don't like babywise because they think it is advocating CIO, but I think the most important thing in it is emphasizing the importance of a routine. It talks a lot about mealtime and important sleep time rituals.

Also, I don't like crying it out, but I did learn to distinguish different cries. He had a tired little whimper that I would let him cry it out and he would fall asleep in less than minutes. But other cries I could tell he needed me.

It is so hard to be a new mother while running on zero sleep. These books helped me and I'm going to reread them before my next little one comes.

Also, you could try the ferber method aka the no-cry method. I haven't used it, but my friends are using it and so far, so good.

fruit_cake_kids said...

Hi, how's it going? It's so difficult because every child is unique & reacts differently to different methods. My son didn't like sleeping alone, so I took the easy way out at the time and now he still sleeps in my bed at 3yrs old.

So I'm no expert ha ha, but I was thinking of advice along the lines of this: how about a calming lullaby cd or nature sounds cd quietly? Maybe start off with putting on the music when you're sitting down together reading (or at another calming time) so he starts to asociate that particular music/sounds with calm down time.

Also, when i read a helpful book about babies bed times when i was having troubles (can't remember the name of it), but I remember one interesting part about 'missing the window' meaning if you miss the window of tiredness, then the kid gets overtired and is near impossible to get to sleep. So I think their advise was to recognise the window (probably at around the same time each evening I imagine) and act on it quickly with the bedtime routine - bath, clean teeth, book & bed.

Other things I'd probably say would be stuff you'd know already such as not to feed the kids sweet things (or with bright colourings) anywhere near bedtimes. My goes instantly hyper after either sugar/sweetners/colouring.

I hope you work out what works for you soon.

Naja

preciousteph said...

My first son was like that too- forget crying it out- he has been a sensitive child since the day he was born, and leaving him alone in any room for more than one minute would result in the type of crying that showed he wasn't just fussy, he was truly terrified. By the time he was 17 months I couldn't take the sleep issues anymore, and bought "The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and PreSchoolers". She also has the original "No-cry Sleep Solution" which is for infants/babies. I implemented her strategies and we've never looked back!! I highly recommend them!

Brad and Britt said...

oh, I miss you! Your stories are making me tear up from both laughter, and feeling sorry! I am sorry my dear friend, but you are such an amazing MOM! always remember that!

lala said...

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Sixten said...

I lol'd :D

Jen said...

We can be on a blog strike together, because I swear if I hear about one more perfect little stay at home mom's life I will puke. As for the sleep--don't let anyone push you around or make you feel bad about it. Afterall--you are his momma for a reason, and a dang good one too!! I have every confidence that you will figure out what works for you. Call me crazy, but I couldn't let my kids just sit and scream either!! I have read the healthy sleep habits, happy baby and found that it has some great ideas. The best part is it offers more than one solution to every sleep problem. Good Luck Megs. Love ya, and don't forget that you are an awesome mom!!!!!!!!!!! (and hot to boot)

Andrea said...

Just stumbled on your blog and chuckled to myself. This took me back almost 14 years to the same struggle with my oldest. I, too, tried the CIO method and had the same tear filled results. I learned later that Jake was afraid of the dark. TERRIFIED. I wonder if I had left him in a lit room with toys, if it would have been different. The only thing that got him to fall asleep on his own was a strict routine of rocking and singing and A BABY BROTHER to share the room. That made it easy for him. 14 years later, he still sleeps with a light and a brother. My only helpful advice is that it WILL PASS!!!! The sleep deprivation is the hardest part at this stage but you will get past it. Hang in there, and give yourselves a HUG!

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